Today I want to kind of talk about the other side of last week’s blog. Last week I talked about how we need to set our own boundaries and how ‘no’ is a complete sentence. Now I want to talk about asking for help.
Some of us, myself included, were brought up knowing how to take care of ourselves. I’m not dissing my parents here, it was kind of an era thing, but sometimes if we went to Mom or Dad and asked for help with something, the answer was, ‘figure it out yourself.’ My guess is at least with my Mom that answer came from a place of a.) I’m so busy raising four kids that I don’t have time to help you, and b.) this will help you with your reasoning skills as you grow older. Regardless, I did kind of figure out how to take care of myself. I also lived on my own for quite awhile before I got married and that added to my independence. I’ll say it…
I don’t like asking for help.
But, I’ve come to realize that playing the part of that person who totally has their act together and never needs help from anyone is not really someone to emulate. There are times in our lives where we need to ask for help. And trust me on this one, there are folks who would do anything to be able grant it.
You know that saying, ‘Put your big girl panties on and get over it.’ Well, I get that it’s beneficial at times. But not always. You are not weak if you need help and ask for it. Again, last week I talked about how we all have to set our boundaries and it’s okay to say no. And I still feel it is. But for me, those rules go out the door when it comes to health or safety, etc. In other words, if my phone rings at 3am and a friend needs help, I’m out the door before I’ve even hung up the phone.
So, for those of you not wanting to ask for help, but really needing it, do us a favor.
Look at it this way. If I asked you for help when I needed it, what would you do?
I thought so.
Live and learn with love…